Sometimes you just have to buy it

Mr. P's schedule has been off for the past 2 days.

I honestly think that this makes him more upset than me, but I have definitely been frustrated. We have places to be, people to see, and I have projects to manage/finish.

I tried for an hour to get him to nap. He is not a "cry it out" type of guy, and honestly, I'm not that type of mom either. But today I needed just a few moments to myself and I let him cry while I sat still. He worked himself up so bad, I felt guilty and like a horrible momma and finally snagged him up so that I could get ready for our day. 

I like to dress up a little on Tues/Thurs since I don't teach yoga on those days and it's fun to (attempt to) look hot and effortless when Happy Hubby returns home from work. None of my clothes seemed to fit right, or be comfortable enough, I'm having a "fat day," and my favorite jeans have a huge hole in the crotch. 

Awesome. 

So, we went to Target :)

I know it seems counter productive, but when Mr. P is a crabby pants, taking him to the store is the only way to guarantee that we can both make it through the day.

Now that you know how lazy heavy guilty unproductive I was feeling the earlier part of today, I'll now tell you about our wonderful adventures in Target!

I try not to shop at Target too often. I like to thrift/junk/build things for my home. With too many projects on my plate at the moment and the desire to quickly accomplish something today I knew this was the right move for both of us.

We found a great parking spot (right next to the cart return- priority as a mom now!) we went right over to the baby food section and got Mr. P 2 up and up baby food squeeze pouches, his favorite treat, and my  sanity in the store around lunch time. 

I have been searching this town high and low for something original with drawers for my office space at the landing/top of our stairs, with no luck. I figured I'd scan Target, but first I had to try on jeans while Mr. P was happily slurping down his baby food pouches. 8 pairs later, I found some that were high waisted enough that I won't have the butt-crack-gap when I sit down, like all of my other pairs. Yes, my friends, I bought some mom jeans today. And they are comfortable. lol

We the headed up to the storage/organization area of Target and I found this beauty:

The idea is:

1. to get it put together

2. to add casters to the bottom

3. to place my printer on top and paper in the drawers

4. replace the drawer pulls with something shiny

5. roll this thing under my desk

We got home from Target and Mr. P went down for a nap! 

I'm rocking my new mom jeans

and attempting to put this thing together!

The moral of my story today is that sometimes you just have to make things easier on yourself.

 Sometimes, you just have to buy it... Don't you just love happy endings?!

Now, wish me luck getting this thing put together!

What have you broken down to purchase in order to complete a project quickly?
or 
How do you deal with a child who won't take their nap?


Exhausted mama hugs,
Lauren D.

Tough night as a step mom...

I'm not too emotional on the internet. Really, I allow many things to roll off of my back. But tonight is a tough night and I need to vent. I chose to do it on my blog for two reasons, first off, I don't even know if anyone even reads what I post or even cares about what I post and second if anyone is reading, I'd like to know that there is someone out there who can either relate or mutter some words (that I'll later repeat to myself) that could guide me through future tough nights like this. The truth is, they happen about once a month.

You see, my bonus daughters come stay with us every third weekend, then we have them for 9 consecutive weeks during the summer. They live in Bend, Oregon. It's 3.5 hours to drive there and 3.5 hours to drive back from there; over the big mountain (Hood) and through the snow Dec-March/April. My amazing husband makes this drive on every third Friday after working a full day at work; he drives all the way down and brings them all the way back. They usually get home around 9:30 pm, which is pretty late for a 4 and 6 year old. We feel it is important to be a family and for them to know that we are family. So we do it. I spend most of my day on the friday that he leaves cleaning the house and preparing meals for the weekend so that we can spend most of our time together having fun. I also spend a lot of time worrying about David being in the car in those weather conditions.

Every time he picks them up the little one always throws a total fit. And his heartbreak starts all over again. They both break their daddy's heart. I hate standing by to see that. It's the same things every time that we talk to the little one about what's wrong and why she doesn't want to come to her Portland home. "You never buy us anything." And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! All of the things that I have come to despise about our modern American culture is being instilled in these two little girls who happen to (also) call me mom. They get every little thing that they ask for.

What ever happened:
To discipline?
To working for what you have?
To taking care of the things that you own?
To using your imagination to entertain yourself?

I could seriously cry. And maybe I have. a little. or maybe a lot.

We have rules in our house and we will stick to them. No matter what.

Although they are not here all the time during the year, they are here for the majority of the summer. They have a little brother who adores them. I don't want them to infuse him with the ideals that have been set by the woman they spend most of their time with. Period.

Don't get me wrong, I love them. It is very hard sometimes, and I struggle with the guilt of "do I love them enough?" But honestly, during the summer when they are at their Portland home, they have manners, they use their muscles, they do chores, dress in modest clothing, listen to actual kids' music and turn into absolutely delightful little girls.

Now, please, if you have read this rant of mine, say something. Anything that I can repeat as a mantra to get me through the next tough Friday night. It'll be here in about 3 weeks.

And if you have stuck around to read all of this, thank you. It is raw and real.

xo
Lauren